Pursuit of Happyness

So I'm sittin' here thinking before I go to work and I'm just amazed I can't believe I've already been here for 2 months and I feel like I haven't really done anything yet... so tomorrow I get done with work a little early and I'm gonna come home and fix my car and then I'm gonna do something fun. Maybe I'll go exploring and see what I can come up with.

On another note I've decided that my life is a total road trip and it's about time I enjoy it. So I guess that means I better start making a kick ass road trip cd. I had this sudden epiphany and I thought, " Wow, this isn't exactly what I thought it was going to be , but when is anything I ever plan exactly the way I want it to be." What would happen if I created my own happiness, even in the middle of complete and total chaos? And why does that scare me more than anything else?

Happiness isn't something that I should be scared of ... it should be something that I am always looking for and always creating. But really I shouldn't even have to look for happiness, I should be able to be ok with things not always be happy, and perfect, and shiny. I wanna be able to see the beauty in the mess, the chaos, and the break down. I don't want to have to wait for some big beautiful ship to come in and bring all my dreams with it... Forget that I'll row out to the ocean on my piece of wood or my cardboard box.

Leo Tolstoy once said, ' That if you want to be happy, be." I think that I forget so much that my happiness is mainly determined by myself and that if I want to be happy all I have to do is be happy. Happiness isn't earned or found it is created and I am determined to create my own happiness. So in creating my happiness I will leave you all with a song and video that makes me happy!